Time to Start Again

Happy New Year!

This is my first real post of 2013, and it feels great to be back in the saddle creating music, writing, and interfacing with Creatives to see what is to come of this new 365 days ahead.

I took about a month off. I’m still in hiding until NAMM. I’ve been traveling. My wife isn’t with me and that sucks. The time out, though, has been important. I tend to go, go, go, go and go some more — no breaks, no time for me. Output, output, output… And very little input. That’s dangerous and I’ve even warned about it in posts to all of you, but sometimes I’m not good at taking my own medicine.

2012 was tough. It was the best year so far in several key areas — I got married to the love of my life. That was, without a doubt, the paramount event of the year. Maybe of my whole life. I’m still on a high from it and life has been pure amazeballz ever since. Biz was solid and several endeavors notched up significantly in 2012. Since a rising tide lifts all ships, a lot of people I work with benefited and I’m super happy about that. More please!

But some things also happened that I don’t care to ever repeat. I walked from two jobs this year. That doesn’t happen often. In fact, before this year, it’s only happened once. Nothing overwhelmingly negative, and the reasons aren’t important here, but at least to me “quitting” is never a fun or exciting way to end something. I prefer the life of a project to come to a natural demise, not a forced one, whether I’m the one doing the forcing or they are. But, some things are just not going to work out and you have to cut the cord, and it can ultimately be the most healthy thing to do.

But it still hurts. Bad. Makes you think about your own creative mortality. Am I still good enough? What did I do wrong? Am I difficult to work with? Am I losing my touch? Have I peaked? Have they peaked? Am I out of my league? Can I no longer play in the league I always have?

That conversation is difficult and your internal voices love to have it. They love the whisper. They love the doubt and the second-guessing. And you know what? It’s okay to have that conversation every once in a while. To keep shit real. To give yourself a reality check now and then. I mean, hey, if you are sucking… You ought to be the first to know, right?!

But only for a minute. Then you have to move on. You have to get back up on the horse and get crackin’ again. Forget all that shit and just create something new. That old thing is… Well… OLD. It’s dead. It’s gone. Now, the next thing is waiting to take shape, and it’s waiting for you. You are the Shaper. There’s nobody else who is going to do it. Not like YOU can. I could do it, but it wouldn’t be the YOU version. And that’s what someone somewhere needs. They need your version. They need your sound, your vision, your perspective, your taste, your touch. Yours.

It’s time. We are nine days into 2013. It’s time to get back at it. Maybe you’ve already started. Maybe you are still sputtering. I don’t know. I’m ready to launch like a fuckin’ Roman Candle, but it took me putting everything down a few weeks, really taking stock and resting up. Are you rested and ready to regroup for some serious ass kicking?

I hope so. I have a feeling that 2013 is going to be a kick or be kicked year!